letter from a husband to his wife

This article is about a letter from a husband to his wife, to share his fascination about wearing a chastity device for his wife. The article was found in a forum. We decided to publish it on our website becasue of the informational value of it. If you also have a problem telling your wife about your secret fantasy, maybe you can use the information in this article.

What is Male chastity?
“Chastity Play” is a phrase often used to refer to male chastity, but as many loving couples know it is so much more than “play”.

Male chastity is an intensely intimate love-style which initially fueled by fantasy is a sensual practice, that can heighten eroticism, and make foreplay seem for ever lasting. It’s something enjoyed by more and more couples, particularly those in their late 30s and beyond. chastity has a unique and very special appeal to affluent couples who are a in a long term, loving, relationship.

Wearing a chastity device places a different emphasis on the genitals, you can no longer take your penis for granted. All direct sexual contact, from masturbation to sex, is prevented, as are affairs and infidelity. Once your penis is locked in chastity and becomes inaccessible, every other part of your body becomes the playground of eroticism, as you become more aware of your other erogenous zones.

A man in chastity learns to explore the sexuality within his relationship. He learns sensuality and the importance of placing his lover’s needs and desires above his own lust. He discovers the pleasure of pleasing, and realizes that sex is no longer simply focused on the penis, intercourse and ejaculation

For Wives & Girlfriends
For Women with Men Fascinated by Male chastity:
This article has been written for women who’ve just become aware of their husband’s or boyfriend’s interest in male chastity. You’ve probably lots of questions running around in your mind, and although we may not have all the answers we’ll try to give you some tips. The main thing to remember is that male chastity can be whatever suits you both as a couple. You don’t have to experience it in the same way as others, you can adapt and use what best suits your love and life styles.

What do you do?
So he’s explained his chastity desires, and wants you to join him by becoming his keyholder. What do you do now?

One thing to bear in mind is that it’s probably taken your man a lot of courage to let you into his secret chastity desires. It’s not easy to talk of something which may cause rejection, and he’s probably thought long and hard about how, when and where to tell you. It’s unlikley to have been an instant, spur of the minute, decision.

Where to find information about Male chastity?
If you do a Google search you’ll discover lots of informative sites, blogs, forums and retail web sites full of information about male chastity and chastity devices. However, a little word of caution: do bear in mind when reading these articles that a high percentage of them are compiled by men and present their perception of male chastity. Some may focus strongly on fantasy rather than reality. There’s nothing wrong with that, it’s how men understand and experience it, but you need to try to work out what’s fact and what’s not. The same applies to books on the subject. Books can be an ideal introduction to chastity, but you need be aware that they’re often written for men rather than “ordinary” wives and girlfriends, even if they appear to be for female keyholders. As you read these articles and blogs you’ll soon get a feeling for what’s fact and what’s exaggeration.

Why is your Husband or Boyfriend interested in male chastity?
The concept of being denied sexual pleasure for the pleasure of pleasing you is highly arousing for your lover. We all have secret fetish dreams, fantasies and hopes and male chastity is just one of those. Because this sexually arousing desire involves the use of a chastity belt or device it may be considered to be a fetish, or a bit kinky, but that’s no bad thing really! We all need a bit of spice and excitement in our lives sometimes!

There are a variety of reasons why men are attracted to male chastity:

It’s a secret fetish that your man finds highly provocative, arousing and very sexy, to the point that even just an image of a chastity device could cause the beginnings of an erection.

Male chastity isn’t just concerned with physical sensations, but the mind, body, emotional and inner most self. He will understand chastity as all encompassing desire, fetish or kink, that’s an intellectual, physical, emotional, sexual and spiritual experience.

From his sexual fantasy perspective the allure is that his loving wife or girlfriend holds the key to his penis. His cock becomes yours, it’s freedom is dependent upon you releasing him.

Your lover believes that he’s masturbating far too much and would like your help to control this by making him wear a chastity device to prevent him touching himself.

He longs to be “Loved, locked and Owned” by you, and he believes that wearing a chastity device will demonstrate his commitment and faithfulness to you.

Orgasm denial is highly arousing to him.

A highly sexy aspect is that your husband will aim to seek his pleasure in pleasing and pleasuring you, thinking of your needs above his own. Wearing a chastity device help him to sexually achieve this.

Although the above list is inclusive of the most common themes, your husband or boyfriend may find chastity appealing for one, several or none of the above reasons. A fetish or kink is a very personal thing and you might want to discover from your lover what is it about chastity that personally turns him on.

If he’s found the courage to tell you about male chastity he’s probably done so because he believes it’s something very special he can share with you, and feels that you may really enjoy and relish it just as much as he.

What’s Special about Male chastity?
Chastity between a loving couple is unique, alluring and arousing. It is a special intimacy between you both, which you can keep secret from the world. Take a look at “What is Chastity” too.

How does chastity enhance your sexual pleasure?
When a man is locked in his chastity device he learns through chivalrous behavior that sexual gratification is not limited to the pleasure and moment of his orgasm.

He learns to place your pleasure above his.

In our culture how often is sex considered finished after he cums? Are you sexually satisfied at this very moment too? Does it feel like you’ve been watching a good film together and he’s switched off the television half way through the movie?

Chastity teaches him to consider you, and your orgasms. He will be denied permission to come on many an occasion, and yet expected to serve his Lady with with skill, devotion and love. He will become a sensual, playful, confident lover considering only the needs of his Lady.

Doesn’t it mean I’ll have less sex?
Quite the contrary!

Male chastity is about you sharing his sexual fantasy and him fulfilling your sexual needs.

Wearing a chastity Device does not mean your man is sexually inadequate. He can be masculine, sexually able, enjoy wearing a chastity device and virile. If you want he can still make the first move in bed.

Chastity offers a fulfilling sex life, arousal, pleasure and fun, but in a different way. A way where his attention is focused on you rather than his own penis, this means that sexual delights have much less to do with traditional “penis-in-vagina” intercourse, and more to do with the delights of extended foreplay, exploration, sensuality, and arousal. You could even combine it with Tantric sexuality.

Although you may decide to keep him locked up he will learn to please you more with his lips, his tongue, his fingers. You may even ask him to pleasure you with your favorite dildo or vibrator.

You can orgasm as often as you like, he can be the soul provider of these orgasms, whilst he is denied the pleasure of his own.

When you’d like to experience full intercourse, release him, then lock him up again. You might like to experiment with his self control, with cum-control, in this case release him ask him to pleasure you but instruct him not to come. After wards lock him up again.

Should he be allowed to cum?
Yes! How often this happens is up to you. He will probably suggest when it should be, but really it is your decision. The special allure of chastity is the promise of an overwhelming orgasm with you. It’s the build up of sexual anticipation that makes chastity work.

Once his penis is locked in a chastity Device he lives in a state of high erotic anticipation which can be joyous, sensually provocative and yet very frustrating, but without the promise of an overwhelming orgasm shared with you, chastity may not work. Very few many men dream of being locked up and their penis totally ignored.

Why does he want me to hold his key?
What excites him is that his penis becomes yours. You control its freedom. You hold the key.

Chastity relies on the excitement of the mind before arousal of his body. This teaches us that the role of the keyholder is pivotal to the chastity love-style. You arouse his thoughts by holding his key and preventing him from touching his penis, masturbation is almost impossible.

When he first hands over his key, part of his fantasy is fulfilled, and if you choose you could wear the key around your neck. As you and your lover experiment with male chastity it’s possible that you may become closer and the bond between you enriches as fantasies are shared and enacted. You may discover that trust, communication, support and the love shared between you builds.

As a keyholder you may discover when your man is safely locked in his chastity device and looking forward to a “Cum-Day” that he will strive just a little more than usual towards better servitude both around the home and in the bedroom. The promise of release is a most compelling stimulant!

Isn’t Submission a sign of weakness?
He can still be masculine, sexy, have the ability to inspire you, arouse you, love you and care for you. .

Submission is not weakness. Submission involves your husband having great trust and belief in you. Submission involves self confidence to express oneself. Submission is honoring you with his mind, body and soul.

Will wearing a chastity device hurt him?
At times it will feel as if the cage of his chastity device is “caressing” his penis, this can heighten arousal, and might feel like he’s wearing your own personal “bondage cuddle”.

He will find that the beginnings of an erection feels more like an “erotic pain” rather than being unbearably painful. These sensations will bring his mind back to you, his keyholder, his loving wife.

Generally wearing a chastity device does not hurt, but you shouldn’t always expect it to feel comfortable right away, it can take a little while for him to become used to it both physically and mentally. If he does experience discomfort, it’s likely to be initially felt around the scrotum where the cock ring of the chastity device fits. He may notice a little pinching and it can take up to 2 weeks or more to fit the perfect fit and comfort techniques.

His penis isn’t going to rub against his trousers or underpants as it might normally, it will be denied almost all touch. When he goes to the bathroom that will be a different experience too. Wearing a chastity device means that can he cannot touch himself and it’s likely he’ll need to sit down to pee.

He is going to feel sexually frustrated at times. As he embarks on his male chastity journey its almost certain that he will be expecting some amount of frustration, but it’s impact won’t be experienced until he’s gone longer than usual without an orgasm. He may get irritable and ask to be released. Whether this release happens is up to you. Don’t always give in to him, How long should I keep him locked up?

Most men tend to be locked up in weekly blocks, i.e. 7, 14, or 21 days or for a month or two. . Once you have agreed the length of time for him to be locked up.

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